Writing with my Impostor Syndrome

I know the saying ‘Jack of all Trades, Master of none,’ but I have often rephrased the second half as “Master of the World.” This helps me stay positive and tackle any challenge thrown my way, especially when I started as a photographer and then moved to cinematography. It’s not like I’ve not had bad days when I began working behind the camera, filled with lots of self-doubt, but thanks to a network of friends and a truly social social media platform bringing me work, I felt more confident with what I had been working on.

But lately, I am being challenged by an old foe. Some days, no matter how much I achieve, a sense of failure sets in, a different kind of doubt creeps in, and this particular flavour of Impostor Syndrome is aimed solely at my writing. To be honest, I think the ghost of my Impostor Syndrome past also has its eye set on when I am practising art, but the voices pulling me down in my head are markedly different, so let’s focus on just one for now!

In the last few weeks, I’ve been looking back on what I’ve not only shared online but also written, to help me feel better. Back in 2023, I challenged myself to write often, so I asked my mutuals on BlueSky for prompts. and I ended up sharing 13 stories. In the first half of 2024, I wrote and shared seven more. I also wrote a handful of other stories that I never shared online. So, I took the 20 flash fiction pieces (from BlueSky prompts) and three unpublished short stories to compile them into an e-book that is now available online. In the second half of 2024, I wrote another five flash fiction stories for my mutuals who supported me on Ko-fi.

Compared to that, in 2025, I have already shared 24 stories on the writing website. I also have a handful of stories on Patreon behind a membership wall (some for free tiers and some for paid tiers). I have written at least 10 stories that I have sent to publications, with one getting selected and a bunch of them being rejected. Honestly, I understand that this is a numbers game, and a very competitive one. I’ve definitely been mentally prepared to receive a lot of rejections, but every rejection hurts a little. My goal with sending these stories out has been to keep me practising writing. I’ve also been trying to write at least 1-2 stories to share online every week for FridayFlashFiction on BlueSky, and even one reply from a reader feels like a win! I know how difficult it is to grab someone’s attention, especially when a 10-second reel can give them a dopamine hit. Why would they spend 2-3 minutes to read just one story?

When I asked for prompts in 2023, I’ll be honest, my target was to write nano-fictions of under 100 words, but on average, I think I was writing stories ranging from 400-1000 words. I slowly started writing longer pieces. I’ve currently been pushing 2000 words or more, based on requirements for calls from magazines.

I do realise that I’ve been trying to spend more and more of my time creating works of art, from traditional to digital (which we will talk about on a different blog-post) as well as written. At the end of the month, when I check where I stand, I feel like I’m constantly falling short. Counting in terms of how many stories or blogs I’ve finished and shared, I feel like it wasn’t enough. The August update that I shared a few days back (after a month of no blog-post) pushed me back into this thought of not being able to finish pieces or good enough. To be honest, the last time I was so prolific with my writing was when I was working on my Doctoral thesis, which obviously needed a lot of work and rework. But I must point out that in the last three months, life has been a lot more challenging, with not enough new work coming my way. I’m not running out of ideas; I have close to a dozen ideas and prompts I want to tackle, and almost every week I come across something that feels like I could turn into a story. But I’m still haunted by the ghost of my impostor syndrome. “Am I just faking it till I actually break into the world of writing?” is a question I ask myself way too often.

Another thing I stumbled on to were a lot of old half-written works either in notebooks, diaries, or even different note apps, and have collated it all on to Log-Seq, and I keep working a little on each, following whatever my brain feels like jumping into. I now have close to 30 work-in-progress pieces (quick count), ranging from a few drabbles to a handful of long ones.

One thing is that as I start writing, I also see a lot of my stories have a possibility of 5000+ words, or I could even stretch something to novella length. But the idea of writing a proper novel feels so daunting, and I cannot even imagine that this is a doable task for me. This is in a lot of ways similar to me always wanting to write a screenplay, but I can’t imagine a 100-page script, while I struggle to even write a 10-page one. Part of me wants to climb these mountains, but also feels like I will keep looking at those peaks from some smaller hill, because how do you even manage to keep putting more and more time into it without knowing what will happen? What would even be possible when one part of your brain is constantly on survival mode and battling with a self-diagnosed ADHD-fuelled squirrel brain? But hopefully all the practice would help me create something great.

Of course, sometimes the constant tangential thoughts inside my head help me come up with ideas, but then I don’t have enough energy to finish them. My WIP list keeps increasing every week, and the list with just a prompt for an idea grows exponentially. I guess it’s best to think more about the positive and give less oxygen to the Impostor voice!

So to end the blog I must say - yesterday, I got an email telling me I had my first paid Patreon follower (Shout-out to O!). These small wins, along with the previous accepted stories, really help me feel that I might not just be chasing an empty dream, and that some people have faith and would like to see me do what I enjoy doing. I just wanted to add that I have 49 short stories on my website as of end of August 2025, and I can’t wait to write more and share more, and hope that at least one person enjoys each of those stories!

Support Me

If you’d like to pick up The Forgotten Alley e-book, you can check Amazon or any other store that you prefer. You can also support me on Ko-Fi or Patreon. Check out Darkroom with new photo prints, INPRNT for art prints, and RedBubble for moore art merch options. Want to commission me to design movie posters, or write stories that you can gift someone? Just drop me a mail. Every bit helps me make rent and cover utilities for next month.

p.s. I have been reading Refuse to be Done, How to Write and Rewrite a Novel in Three Drafts by Matt Bell and I have been revisiting it often to help my brain think in a more structured manner to write longer stories, and more impactful shorter ones.

p.p.s. If you’ve liked any of my shorts, let me know which one on BlueSky!

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